Unconscious humour from posters

[nukecad]

It's one of those days:

Internal Blocked Plumbing

Maybe try having 1m of waist pipe removed?

[nukecad]

So many in that one post:

My mate was having trouble with his waist pipe for years, the wonder liquids would not unblock it at all, only relieved it for a bit.

I'd see a doctor mate.

1m of the waist pipe was removed

Eek!

I have just had a bathroom suit fitted

Similar to a birthday suit?

[JK0]

My mate was having trouble with his waist pipe for years

It's old age.

[jpucng62]

Are they standing or sitting? Screenshot 2021-02-18 at 13.10.05.png

[JK0]

As you have stated, you have two obvious negatives ...
CCJs - not one but three
Pets - not one but three.

Children - not one but three.

[JK0]

BTW what a great industry to be in - Indemnity Insurance - pay me a few quid for a risk that I'll never have to pay out on and I'll insure anything!!!

Business interruption?

Sure, and if there's a pandemic and you're told to shut your business, we'll pay up... unless it's a disease we've never heard of before.

[JK0]

try to ask them if they would want it carried out every 3-4 weeks

Crikey, the electrical regs are tough now.

[JK0]

Thank you for the reply . There is however one issue on my part that Is, I have missed the landlord's first rent payment after which he took this extreme measure....
will I still be able enforce my possession?

The cheek of some people, eh?

[nukecad]

Only just noticed this one from a while back which gave me a chuckle:

And the Flat Earth Society have supporters in every corner of the globe.

What 'globe'?
It's flat, it wouldn't have corners if it was a globe

[nukecad]

Hybrid letting agent!

These mutations are spreading. Can we get vaccinated against it?

[JK0]

No Pets allowed to be made illegal

So tenants could have pet crocodiles, tigers, gorillas, etc?

[MdeB]

I just had tenanted oven fixed.

I thought beds in sheds was bad, but ...

[MdeB]

Wouldn't a monthly service of 'cats' be more effective?

I wouldn't wand anyone who services cats or mice anywhere near me.

[JK0]

Many people have a problem with mice at home and at work place. Call us at ************* and get monthly service of mice to completely stop them.

Wouldn't a monthly service of 'cats' be more effective?

[nukecad]

Surely your guidance should come from your solicitor, rather than some dubious individuals on an internet forum!

I'm often dubious about some of the stories we get told on the forum.