Unconscious humour from posters

[tommyharold45]

From one of today's threads:

Any chance of claiming any damages from the landlord? My furniture and other staff now smells and the whole house will need a thorough cleaning.

I told him to make sure the staff take a shower and change their clothes.

Your this "I told him to make sure the staff take a shower and change their clothes" don't know why makes me feel sarcastic

[jpkeates]

Hmmm

https://forums.landlordzone.co.uk/fo...-needed-please

Meet

https://forums.landlordzone.co.uk/fo...e-damage-costs

[nukecad]

if the electrician has floundered building regs

Sounds a bit fishy to me.

[nukecad]

Various posts -

I would sell if I could

What you really mean is "I would like to sell for a certain price, but no-one will give me that price".

[JK0]

First let me make it clear that I am not a professional landlord

Did this make anyone else chuckle?

[nukecad]

... the ground rent from the airspace ...

The best oxymoron I've seen in a while.

[nukecad]

Tenant broke old coin electric meter can I ..?

Well if you really want to.

[nukecad]

Asbestoes / Health and Safety / Fire Risk Assesment

Your toes are going to be OK though.

[nukecad]

Sink in toilet

You shouldn't wash your hands in the toilet bowl.

Or is it related to this?

Tenant did a poo in the sink.

[JK0]

The freeholder answers properly as described above and then quite reasonably tells you to get stuffed.

And this.

[JK0]

my right to quiet enjoyment (which I am not enjoying)?

This just cracked me up.

[nukecad]

As well as being a bit too late after they have already rented somewhere?

[JK0]

Whyever should I provide a booklet of " how to rent " though.? Surely that's up to the tenant to find and read themselves If they are new to renting?

I think we all feel the same buddy.

[jpkeates]

You'll know how Belvoir should be pronounced (as in the Hunt)??

If the bloke's there for that, she's definitely blocking him!

[theartfullodger]

image_2460.png I try not to ad block on here, but does anyone understand what the point of the image on the Belvoir Ad is about.

A woman in bed in a facemask while a smiling bloke looks at her.

I'm not sure how that connects to the return on my investment?

You'll know how Belvoir should be pronounced (as in the Hunt)??