Unconscious humour from posters

[JK0]

I am hunk these were probably there when he moved in but I'm pretty sure that they shouldn't be as they add significant weight to the roof and affect the drainage.

Can you not take the slabs off yourself, then?

[theartfullodger]

.....................All reptiles gratefully received.

Aye, I've had tenants like that also....

[JK0]

We're good tenants.

Ahh, but they all say that.

[nukecad]

I consider myself a good landlord.

Ahh, but they all say that.

[JK0]

In terms of damage, say for example they breAk down the walls, cut the joists to the first floor , rip sealing down , etc etc, can the police Assist with this...

Only if they are raiding the place.

[JK0]

since the new regulations came out in January requiring a BS certificate

Yeah, most certificates are a load of BS.

[JK0]

The second is whether the neighbour has a right of eavesdrop

I don't think you can stop neighbour overhearing your conversations.

[nukecad]

Mice bats

Whack-a-mole time?

Seems a bit severe, most people just use a spring trap or poison.

[JK0]

My local council is in touch with an organisation that will rent your property off you for a minimum of 5 years, guaranteed rent and looked after less fair w&t. They then house refugees in it.

But what would be fair wear & tear for a property housing refugees for 5 years?

[Berlingogirl]

But what would be fair wear & tear for a property housing refugees for 5 years?

Same as for anyone else I would hope.

[JK0]

Same as for anyone else I would hope.

Hmm. Well I can't comment further without being politically incorrect.

[JK0]

There's a process available where for a fee (I think it's £50.00), the tenant can be summoned to court to have their financial situation reviewed and a repayment plan "agreed".

Not attending the review is a criminal offence.

Now if we could just do that before the tenancy...

[Mrs Mug]

it's £16 for RLA members or £24 for non-members. (Other curses are available).

A curse on both their houses

[nukecad]

My typo so - Bu**er, boll*cks, damn and blast, plus other available curses.

[JK0]

'Good letting agents?'