Unconscious humour from posters

[JK0]

There is no water mains stopcock under the sink; it is located behind the dishwasher!

How very dare they! (sarc)

[JK0]

if you are owed rent arrears you must keep the goods for 3 months, if you weren't owed money then it's 28 days.

It's a mad mad world.

[JK0]

Budgets are always going to build a stronger more prosperous economy.

Did you omit the '#sarcasm' ?

[jpkeates]

Did you omit the '#sarcasm' ?

As if!!!!!!!

[JK0]

Most rouge landlords use commercial lenders as they usually have large portfolio's from the ones I have seen

Yeah, they won't see the person wearing rouge.

[JK0]

There is a communal garden which has the lease holder washing hanging in the garden almost every day.

Unfortunately they have not changed.

I think you've been too harsh. They obviously don't dare wash at all now.

[theartfullodger]

Hi

I am looking for a document to explain to tenants that our company has taken over the residential property management of their tenancies.

Can anyone help me?

That's from someone describing themselves as Property Professionals....

[theartfullodger]

The tenants recently reported damp issues so I have had an environment health office undertake a full investigation of the property and come up with a long list of things that I need to address.

The report has come back with numerous category 1 and 2 issues, some are fair enough, however other issues seem unjustified....

...................oops.......

[nukecad]

...decided to maintain the pool themselves and dispose of the person who was being paid to maintain it.

Did they drown him?

[JK0]

Did they drown him?

That would certainly stop him sending any more bills.

[JK0]

Due to being abroad, my car is stored in my garage at the block and not available to my new tenant.

It's very kind of you to provide a car for your previous tenant.

[JK0]

Landlord wants to send Surveyor to proof I am naughty!

Maybe he wants to inspect your boudoir.

[KeepTheFaith]

Maybe he wants to inspect your boudoir.

Well I been worrying he might discover the dungeon I built in the spare room! 😅

[JK0]

Works wonders with SWMBO who is feeling slightly chilly so turns it up to 25.. Limits it to 21

You need a new abreviation: SWTSBO

(She who thinks she's being obeyed)

[jpkeates]

"who is feeling slightly chilly so turns it up to 25"

Why is the bedroom so cold
Turned away on your side?