Unconscious humour from posters

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  • JK0
    replied
    The maintenance guy put in his report for it to be replaced and also told me they had told another tenant to use a bucket as replacing their toilet was deemed out of their remit
    To flush it, or to cr*p in?

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  • nukecad
    replied
    If tenant leaves carp,
    Make fish and chips for supper.

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  • JK0
    replied
    My Deposits say the insurance only pays out in the event of dispute not in cases of theft or misappropriation by the agent. If anyone has any experience of this or dealing with My Deposits would be grateful for your thoughts.
    Well that's about as much use as a chocolate teapot then, isn't it?

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  • tommyharold45
    replied
    Originally posted by JK0 View Post
    From one of today's threads:

    Any chance of claiming any damages from the landlord? My furniture and other staff now smells and the whole house will need a thorough cleaning.

    I told him to make sure the staff take a shower and change their clothes.
    Your this "I told him to make sure the staff take a shower and change their clothes" don't know why makes me feel sarcastic

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  • jpkeates
    replied
    Hmmm

    https://forums.landlordzone.co.uk/fo...-needed-please

    Meet

    https://forums.landlordzone.co.uk/fo...e-damage-costs

    Leave a comment:


  • nukecad
    replied
    if the electrician has floundered building regs
    Sounds a bit fishy to me.

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  • nukecad
    replied
    Various posts -
    I would sell if I could
    What you really mean is "I would like to sell for a certain price, but no-one will give me that price".

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  • JK0
    replied
    First let me make it clear that I am not a professional landlord
    Did this make anyone else chuckle?

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  • nukecad
    replied
    ... the ground rent from the airspace ...
    The best oxymoron I've seen in a while.

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  • nukecad
    replied
    Tenant broke old coin electric meter can I ..?

    Well if you really want to.

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  • nukecad
    replied
    Asbestoes / Health and Safety / Fire Risk Assesment
    Your toes are going to be OK though.

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  • nukecad
    replied
    Sink in toilet
    You shouldn't wash your hands in the toilet bowl.

    Or is it related to this?
    Tenant did a poo in the sink.

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  • JK0
    replied
    The freeholder answers properly as described above and then quite reasonably tells you to get stuffed.
    And this.

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  • JK0
    replied
    my right to quiet enjoyment (which I am not enjoying)?
    This just cracked me up.

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  • nukecad
    replied
    As well as being a bit too late after they have already rented somewhere?

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