Potential harassment of tenant

[ngriffiths]

Hi there,

I've recently had the following text conversation with a tenant. I wondered if anyone had been in a similar situation and if anyone had any specific advice they could pass on?

Tenant

Hi, nothing wrong with the house but I'm having real problems with the next door neighbour he has become very attached to me and has even been sending flowers to my work (don't know how he found out were I work) I have been told to go to the police a it's boarding harassment just thought you should know x

Me

Which neighbour is it? I'm more than happy to have a polite word with him

Tenant

The guy on his own to the left but at the back... He keeps giving my daughter presents (a 10ft trampoline) and I really don't know what to do now he has a very messed up Background (he has a book which tells all) and has already told me both his brothers are pedophiles so obviously as you can imagine I'm on pins at the moment

Me

Absolutely understand that and, in all honesty, I'd prob go to police myself! What do you want me to do? I'm happy to go and speak to him myself for you, happy to find out who he rents from and try to speak to his landlord or happy to speak to police for you or whatever you want? I wont accept you being harassed!

Tenant

He's bought the house 9months ago... I don't think there's much I can do at the moment bar log it with the police but I just wanted you to know as it is your house after all, also is there anyway we can get the gate secured in the garden? I can ask dad just didn't want to go ahead without asking... I will send you a copy of the letter he attached with flowers and you will understand a lot more then x

I definitely don't like the thought of her being harassed and would like to be proactive in protecting her, also, don't want to lose a good tenant!

Thanks for any help.

[ram]

You are doing the right thing.
Many on here would tell you it's no concern of yours, as you cannot
control who buys or rents next door.

But it IS up to your tenant to call the police, and do him for
harrassment as you can't do it for her.

Yes, go and talk to the man and tell him to back off.
Also get the gate secured as requested.

That's as much as you can do.
Probably if you do see the man, then more problems may arrise, and
your tenant would probably leave, no matter what you do.

So make sure you have a phone conversation with your tenant, and
point out the situation can go 2 ways.
1) A man ( you ) calling round to tell him to backoff, may stop him.
2) the situation gets worse because he has been told to back off
and he does not want to, and feels it's no concern of yours.

Bottom line is, your tenant will probably move, and you will have to
rent to men only next time.

R.a.M.

[midlandslandlord]

You could also make sure that doors are secure etc, spy holes and chains etc, and perhaps put in CCTV (or dummy CCTV) watching the garden if T requests it.

ML

[westminster]

Personally, I think you should do nothing other than advise the tenant to report the matter to the police, and either install a lock or give her permission to install a lock on the garden gate.

You are not the tenant's protector, and getting involved could easily escalate the situation. A polite word is hardly likely to have any effect, and if it goes beyond politeness, e.g. threats to back off, you could end up with the neighbour assaulting you or reporting you to the police.

[westminster]

Yes, go and talk to the man and tell him to back off....

...
1) A man ( you ) calling round to tell him to backoff, may stop him.
2) the situation gets worse because he has been told to back off
and he does not want to, and feels it's no concern of yours.

So, you advise OP to talk to the neighbour even though you think it could well lead to the situation worsening?

This is a clearly a police matter and OP should not get involved.

[LesleyAnne]

I agree with Westminster. Whilst your concern for your tenant is admirable, you are not their guardian. Tell tenant to seek advice from the police, and if you are happy for her dad to supply/fit a lock to the gate then fine. Indeed, it is her Dad who should be fighting this battle and supporting her, not you.

You could also suggest that she writes this guy a letter - sometimes spoken words and actions can be misconstrued, and this guy obviously got the wrong end of the stick somewhere along the line. She should just tell him firmly that the gifts he is showering on her and her daughter are not welcome, and please could he refrain from bothering her, calling on her and contacting her at work, otherwise she will be taking legal advice against him for harrassment. Sometimes the "letting them down gently" approach, doesn't work, and she needs to curtail this before it goes any further.

By the way, just because there seems to be some accusations of paedophilia towards his brothers, does not mean he is of the same ilk.

[ram]

So, you advise OP to talk to the neighbour even though
you think it could well lead to the situation worsening?

Correct, but I did say it could go 2 ways.
He backs off, or not.

ngriffiths has a choice as to what he does, and has asked for an oppinion.
But note also, i said :-
But it IS up to your tenant to call the police, and do him for
harrassment as you can't do it for her.

So we can offer no more solutions as we have all given various
solutions, which only ngriffiths can decide which way to go.

R.a.M.

[ngriffiths]

Ah, the wonders of being a landlord - things are never simple :-)

I do appreciate all of your replies though, and this scenario has certainly given me food for thought. My preference is that she speaks to him (or letter) and tells him she's not interested. Her dad can too if necessary. Then they can call the police if needed.

Then we'll have to see what happens. CCTV is an option, but probably not cost effective, most likely is I'll be looking for an alternative tenant (or sell up and find an alternative property!)

[Brb]

I think it's got too far for a letter. He's given her expensive gifts so in his mind they are close.


Over twenty years ago whilst at college another student stalked me. He would follow me home, write poetry and recorded a song. It is very hard to tell someone to bog off when they are being that *nice* to you. I decided to tell him one more time that I was not interested in him that way and well it resulted in my being attacked in the lift of the college and my clothes torn off me with him trying to get us up to the third (empty) floor of the building. If Karen hadn't called the lift on our 2nd floor I dread to think what could have happened.

Tell her to go to the police.